Caffeine-addled ramblings, rants, and random thoughts about my life in pursuit of utter awesomeness and general kickassery.

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Friday, February 20, 2009

Rules for Life

Over the years, I've learned many a thing.

And in order for you to become as awesome as me, I have put together a list of rules for being an all-around kickass person.

So without further adieu...

Tenacious B's Rules for Life

Rule 1. Memorize a poem.
Rule 2. Learn something about everything.
Rule 3. Learn everything about something.
Rule 4. Call your mother.
Rule 5. One person can make a difference.
Rule 6. When people make fun of you, you’re on the right track.
Rule 7. The journey is infinitely more important than the destination.
Rule 8. Know at least 3 jokes: A clean one, a dirty one, and one that makes you snort.
Rule 9. Treat yourself regularly.
Rule 10. Go for a walk.
Rule 11. It’s sometimes ok to say no.
Rule 12. It’s sometimes ok to say yes.
Rule 13. Life is not fair.
Rule 14. Most powerful phrases to know:
• “I Love You.”
• “I was wrong.”
• “I forgive you.”
• “I don’t know.”
• “I promise.”
Rule 15. Most disempowering phrases are:
• “I need to remember to…”
• “You’re wrong.”
• “I’m right”
• “You can’t”
Rule 16. Duct tape can fix almost anything.
Rule 17. Pick your battles.
Rule 18. Work isn’t important.
Rule 19. Perception is reality.
Rule 20. If you aren’t smiling and laughing most of the time, find out why.
Rule 21. Liking yourself is the best way to get others to like you.
Rule 22. Giving Love is the best way to receive Love.
Rule 23. People die.
Rule 24. Nobody can change rule #23.
Rule 25. Give hugs whenever you can.
Rule 26. You are not your parents. Repeat that.
Rule 27. Everything will be fine.
Rule 28. Ask questions.
Rule 29. Answer questions.
Rule 30. Walk in the rain.
Rule 31. Ask yourself, “In 50 years, will this really matter?”
Rule 32. Learn from kids. They see everything we filter out.
Rule 33. Enjoy the cuddle.
Rule 34. Know the difference between “your” and “you’re.”
Rule 35. Somebody Loves you.
Rule 36. Your body is the only one you get.
Rule 37. Be nice to strangers.
Rule 38. It’s ok to cry now and then
Rule 39. You can do anything. You can’t do everything.
Rule 40. Live with passion
Rule 41. Your work and your life are mutually exclusive.
Rule 42. Don’t Panic.
Rule 43. Nobody can tell you how to be you.
Rule 44. You deserve everything you earn.
Rule 45. Never, ever, ever, under any circumstances even remotely suggest that a woman is pregnant. Ever.
Rule 46. Learn to lead, learn to follow.
Rule 47. Expect the best, prepare for the worst.
Rule 48. Jump in with both feet.
Rule 49. Trust everyone, but always cut the cards.
Rule 50. Get a mentor.
Rule 51. You get back what you put in.
Rule 52. Nothing is a mistake.
Rule 53. Nothing is an accident.
Rule 54. The best is yet to come.
Rule 55. Nobody but you really cares about your birthday. But care about others’.
Rule 56. Smile. Share. Listen. Help. Live. Laugh. Love. Respect.
Rule 57. Start at least one new thing.
Rule 58. Finish at least one old thing.
Rule 59. Smell the flowers, dammit.
Rule 60. Exceed your own expectations.
Rule 61. Leave a place better than when you arrived.
Rule 62. Don’t bullshit yourself.
Rule 63. This too shall pass.
Rule 64. You are the best thing you can give.
Rule 65. Unreasonable people are the ones that change the world.
Rule 66. Find the good in everything.
Rule 67. Obstacles are to be used as tools, not crutches.
Rule 68. We have the capability and right to be happy.
Rule 69. Have no regrets.
Rule 70. Cherish your friends.
Rule 71. Learn about what’s going on in the world.
Rule 72. It’s never too late to have a happy childhood.
Rule 73. Miracles happen every day. Teach yourself to see them.
Rule 74. Never drink tequila when angry.
Rule 75. You can’t win if you don’t play.
Rule 76. Nobody cares if you can’t sing or dance. Sing and dance.
Rule 77. Jealousy is dumb.
Rule 78. There are no bad emotions.
Rule 79. Learn to be silly.
Rule 80. You can’t please everyone.
Rule 81. There is no acceptable reason for using the CAPS LOCK key. Ever.
Rule 82. Everyone is someone else’s weirdo.
Rule 83. Nobody will ever understand women and why they do certain things. Accept this.
Rule 84. Get to the point.
Rule 85. No one is in charge of your happiness except you.
Rule 86. When delegating, give your hardest task to the laziest person. He’ll always find the quickest and the easiest way to do it.
Rule 87. Never pass up the opportunity to meet someone new.
Rule 88. Thoughts, wishes, goals, and hopes are things. Cherish these.
Rule 89. Karma exists.
Rule 90. When in doubt, reboot.
Rule 91. Define your work; never let your work define you.
Rule 92. No matter how good you are at something, someone is better than you. Find this person and learn from them.
Rule 93. Mean what you say. Say what you mean.
Rule 94. Never stop learning.
Rule 95. Try something new.
Rule 96. Vote.
Rule 97. It’s ok to have high expectations for people, and it’s just as ok to have them not achieve them. Disappointment doesn’t help them, and sometimes they will surprise you with success.
Rule 98. At least once a day, stop and look around you. Don’t let the world go by without your approval.
Rule 99. Let go.